Football Match Jokes

What's the difference between a football match and a referendum?

In a football match, the best team wins.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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What lights up a football stadium ?

A football match !

What lights up a football pitch at night?

A football match.......

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Football Stadium Jokes More Football Stadium Jokes

What lights up a football stadium ?

A football match !

Why did the turkey get kicked out of the football stadium?

He tripped a fan

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

How can a man go 7 days without sleeping?

Sleep at night

What do you call it when the women in the back of a mexican brothel talk after working all night?

Whorechata. Probably my best original, lemme know what you think.

Person Jokes More Person Jokes

What will you call a person who sleeps next to a close relative?

A) NapKin

What do you call a person who farts in private?

A private tutor

Referendum Jokes More Referendum Jokes

What's the plural of "Referendum"?

Riots.

What's the difference between a football match and a referendum?

In a football match, the best team wins.

Win Jokes More Win Jokes

How did the barber win the race?

He knew a short cut.

Why'd the farmer win the lifetime achievement award?

Because he was always out standing in his field.

Football Pitch Jokes More Football Pitch Jokes

What part of a football pitch smells nicest?

The scenter spot!

What lights up a football pitch at night?

A football match.......

L. Jokes More L. Jokes

Why is it spelled 'cancelled' in the UK, but 'canceled' in the US?

Because the US gave the UK that L back in 1776.

Why is it "canceled" in America, but "cancelled" in England?

Because we gave them that L in 1776.

Shout Jokes More Shout Jokes

What did the physics professor shout when he disproved Hooke's Law in early to mid March?

Spring break!

How do you make 30 senior citizens swear?

Shout "Bingo!" before them