How are a grenade and a wife similar?

If you pull the ring off it, the house is gone

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What do farmers give their wives on Valentine's Day?

Hog and kisses!

How do we know JFK was a fan of PDA?

He was all over his wife at the parade

House Jokes More House Jokes

What did the hippie say when you told him to leave your house?

Namaste

How many Brits does it take to change a broken lightbulb?

None. They just move out of the house.

Pull Jokes More Pull Jokes

What did Luke get for pulling Darth Vader's face mask off?

A 15 yard penalty.

What mustache can an alien not pull off?

A human chu

Grenade Jokes More Grenade Jokes

Why don't off duty police men fire grenades into children's cribs?

If you're good at something never do it for free.

How are a grenade and a girlfriend similar?

If they're good ones, they'll both blow really well.

Ring Jokes More Ring Jokes

What's the similarity between Santa Claus and your doorbell ringing at 3am?

It's your dad.

How did the phone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.