How are new marriages just like LOST?

The Significant Others just want babies.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

How to tell an Irishman from a Scotsman on St. Patrick's day?

One wants to stay drunk all the time and the other doesn't want to pay the tab.

Who do fish listen to when they want to hear some dubstep?

Krillex.

Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

What do you call a lost Asian man?

Disoriental

What did the pavement smoother say after he lost his hands?

I literally can't even."

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

Why do people always make such a fuss over how much a newborn weighs?

It's a baby, not a stash of heroin.

Who's bigger?

Mr. Bigger Or Mr. Bigger's baby The baby, because it is a little Bigger.