How many Scots didn't turn up to vote?

One in Fife

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What do Americans do immediately after winning the World Cup (Soccer)?

Turn off the Playstation.

How did Satan turn an unbeliever holy?

He scared the hell out of him.

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Why do asians got to the hospital after voting?

Everyone knows that you should see a doctor for an erection that last longer than 4 hours.

Why won't the holocaust survivor vote for Bernie Sanders?

He doesn't want to feel the Bern.

Scot Jokes More Scot Jokes

How many Scots didn't turn up to vote?

One in Fife

Why do Scots wear kilts?

Sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.

Fife Jokes More Fife Jokes

Who was that piccolo I saw you with last night?

A: The other replies "That was no piccolo that was my fife."

How many Scots didn't turn up to vote?

One in Fife