What did one deer say to the other after leaving the bar?

I can't believe you just blew 50 bucks in there

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Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What does a tree do when he's going on a vacation?

He packs his trunk and leaves. I should go back to studying now. K bye.

Why couldn't the NSA whistleblower leave Russia?

He was snowed in.

Blow Jokes More Blow Jokes

Why does it always seem like models' hair is blowing in the wind?

They have big fans.

Why did the surfer join ISIS?

Because he was totally radical! EDIT: I guess this didn't blow up.

Deer Jokes More Deer Jokes

What do you say when you catch a deer with no eyes?

I have no-eye-deer! (Unless you're a dad, you may need to sound it out)

How do deer get revenge?

By giving each other a taste of their own venison

Believe Jokes More Believe Jokes

What's the difference between feminism and Islam?

One is demonized by the actions and beliefs of a small minority. The other believes in the wage gap myth.

How many Buddhists does it take to screw a light bulb?

None. They believe that the enlightenment comes from within.

Bar Jokes More Bar Jokes

Why did the ghost go to the bar?

For the BOOOOze.

What did Larry McMurtry say when his neighbor asked to borrow a bar of soap?

He said "Sure! I could loan some Dove".

50 Buck Jokes More 50 Buck Jokes

How much for a consultation?

Three questions for $150 bucks." "Kinda steep, isn't it " "Yeah, now what's your last question."

What's the difference between a garbanzo and a chickpea?

I've never paid 50 bucks to have a garbanzo on my face.