What's the difference between a doctor and God?

God doesn't walk around thinking he's a doctor.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a thug and a phone charger?

A phone charger charges batteries, but a thug has battery charges

What's the difference between Ethiopians and gorillas?

Nobody cares about Ethiopians dying. (First post on r/jokes and a bit offensive)

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

Whatever's the matter ?

asked her mother. 'I don't know' replied Mary 'but the teacher thinks I may have caught decimals.'

Why isn't there a straight pride parade?

They tried that but people kept on thinking it was the checkout line at Home Depot.

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

Why was Jon walking backwards on the first day of school?

A: Everyone kept saying it was back to school time.

How much for the giant, walk-in medicine cabinet?

Sir, this is a liquor store."

God Jokes More God Jokes

How do you know that God isn't a woman?

Because I'm not a sandwich.

What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.

Doctor Jokes More Doctor Jokes

Why do doctors hate Wolves?

Lupus

What do you call a doctor who is always available?

An oncallogist.