What's worse than locking your keys in your car in front of an abortion clinic?

Going in and asking for a coat hanger.

This joke may have profanity.
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Car Jokes More Car Jokes

What did the cow say when she got hit by a car?

Moo." What did the cow saw when she fell into a ditch? "Moo." What did the cow say when she fell onto the electric fence? "Moo." What did the cow say when she got hit by a train? "Why does everything always happen to meeee?" Protip: My dad wrote this joke for me when I was six.

How do you get an Asian to crash their car?

Make the windshield full screen

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

When your boss asks you "do I look stupid to you?

it's a rhetorical question I know this now

How does a chef ask to leave the dinner table?

He says, "Gourmet I be excused?"

Coat Jokes More Coat Jokes

What does the Queen put on her toast?

Maamilade! Tada....... anyone? Anyone? I'll get my coat

Why doesn't anyone get laid on Thanksgiving?

All the coats are on the bed!

Lock Jokes More Lock Jokes

What does a suburban neighbourhood do if there's a blackout?

They lock their doors and windows.

How do you prove that your dog loves you more than your wife?

Lock them both in the trunk of the car for an hour, then open it up and see which one of them is happier to see you.

Key Jokes More Key Jokes

What key do you need to open a banana?

A monkey

What do locking the keys in your car and getting your girlfriend pregnant have in common?

both can be solved with a coat hanger

Abortion Clinic Jokes More Abortion Clinic Jokes
Hanger Jokes More Hanger Jokes

What does getting pregnant and locking your car keys in your car have in common?

They can both be fixed with a coat hanger.

Why do you never see a pregnant plane?

They always go to the hanger.