Which part of your body shuts down last when you die?

The eyes, cause they di-late.

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Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What did Tupac say when his best friend died?

No Biggie.

How did the stoner die?

Blunt force trauma.

Shut Jokes More Shut Jokes

Why don't women fart?

They can't shut up long enough to build up pressure.

How do you get a guitar player to shut up?

Put sheet music in front of him

Eye Jokes More Eye Jokes

What's green and hurts when it hits you in the eye?

A snooker table

Why am I not asleep?

he thought, while shining a beam of pure information directly into his eyes from eight inches away.

Body Jokes More Body Jokes

Why does a giraffe need such a long neck?

Because its head is so far away from its body.

Why are giraffe's heads so far away from their bodies?

Long necks.

Di Jokes More Di Jokes

What did Dodi Fayed say to his driver?

Want to go out with me and Di tonight?

Wherefore art thou Romeo?

Romeo: New phone. Who dis