Why did a footballer take a piece of rope onto the pitch ?

He was the skipper !

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Piece Jokes More Piece Jokes

What was the inscription on the tomb of Frankenstein's monster?

HERE LIES FRANKENSTEIN'S MONSTER. MAY HE REST IN PIECES.

Why did the redditor stand on a piece of fruit to check his weight?

BECAUSE HE WAS USING A BANANA FOR SCALE

Rope Jokes More Rope Jokes

What lands first?

The leaf, a rope stopped the emo.

Why do sailors give their wives a bouqet of ropes instead of flowers?

It's a bouqet of forget-me-knots.

Pitch Jokes More Pitch Jokes

What should a football team do if the pitch is flooded?

Bring on their subs!

How about a month filled with stress and obligation?

Pitch for December

Footballer Jokes More Footballer Jokes

What does a footballer and a magician have in common ?

Both do hat tricks !

Why did the footballer hold his boot to his ear?

Because he liked sole music!

Skipper Jokes More Skipper Jokes

Why did a footballer take a piece of rope onto the pitch ?

He was the skipper !

What do you call a man with no arms or legs... ... sitting at your door?

Matt. ...floating in your pool Bob. ...hanging on your wall Art. ... water skiing Skipper.