Why did Jesus quit playing hockey?

He kept getting nailed to the boards.

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Play Jokes More Play Jokes

Why should you never play cards in the jungle?

Because of all the cheetahs

What did Saddam Hussein say every time he played pool?

I rack.

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

What do you think Jesus's stance would be on guns?

I think he would be most strict on nail gun control. (Credit to Taylor on PKA)

What's the difference between Jesus and Sasha Grey?

The look on their face while being nailed.

Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

Why shouldn't a dentist and manicurist be in a relationship?

All they will do is fight tooth and nail!

What did the Romans say to each other after crucifying Jesus?

Nailed it!"

Quit Jokes More Quit Jokes

What did Pinocchio say to Rudolph when he asked him what he asked for Christmas?

Quit being nosey.

What does a retired Olympic sprinter have in common with Bernie Sanders?

He quit running.

Board Jokes More Board Jokes

Why didn't Jesus like to play hockey?

He didn't like getting nailed to the boards.

Why is Jesus so bad at hockey?

Because he keeps getting nailed to the boards!