Why is an executioner a terrible high-fiver?

He always leaves you hanging

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Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off?

He's all right now.

What is the last thing that tickle-me elmo gets before he leaves the factory?

Two test tickles

Hang Jokes More Hang Jokes

How are you doing this morning?

Me: *finishing hanging bag of coffee upside down like an IV and tying my arm off* Fine, you

Why did the scientist regret naming the organism "Fungus"?

Because after they hung out Gus was actually a pretty boring guy.

Executioner Jokes More Executioner Jokes

How did the executioner learn about knots?

By watching the noose.

What did the executioner say to his wife when he left?

I'll beheading out now.