Why was the accountant constipated?

He couldn't budget.

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Constipate Jokes More Constipate Jokes

What laxative did the constipated man ask for?

Poop-ease

Why are constipated people so rude?

They don't give a crap

Budget Jokes More Budget Jokes

Why was the accountant constipated?

He couldn't budget.

Why couldn't the accountant keep his car in working order?

Because it broke down and he couldn't budget.

Accountant Jokes More Accountant Jokes

What does it mean when an accountant is drooling out of both sides of his mouth?

His desk is level

What does an accountant call a friend's birthday party?

x-post from /r/tax) A present liability!