Grouch Jokes

How are Oscar the Grouch and the Olympic Diving Pools in Rio de Janeiro similar?

They're both green, smell like farts, and will stay that way for 47 years.

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What's the difference between Oscar the grouch and a grouch at the Oscars?

Ones green and the other is black

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Oscar Jokes More Oscar Jokes

What's the difference between Oscar the grouch and a grouch at the Oscars?

Ones green and the other is black

What did Matthew McConaughey have to say about the 2016 Oscar-winner's line-up?

All white, all white, all white!

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

What's the deal with the Z Fighters?

They aren't fighting to stay awake!

What do agnostic, insomniac dyslexics do at night?

A: Stay awake and wonder if there's a dog

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a kid and a cat?

Who has the diploma when you get rid of them.

What's the difference between 9/11 and a cow?

You can't milk a cow for 15 years.

Rio De Janeiro Jokes More Rio De Janeiro Jokes

What Pokemon would you catch in Rio De Janeiro?

Zikachu.

What did the Russian athlete say when he was stung by a mosquito during the Summer Olympics in Rio de Janeiro?

zika blyat

One Jokes More One Jokes

Whats the difference between congress and parliament?

Ones filled with a bunch of baboons and the other just doesn't give a hoot during the day.

What's the difference between a Zippo and a hippo?

Ones really heavy, and the other's a little lighter!

Fart Jokes More Fart Jokes

What do you call a fart in the middle of the night? What do you call a fart in the mourning?

A midnight snack A hot Breakfast

Why do men fart more than women?

Because women won't shut up long enough to build up the pressure.