Grouch Jokes

How are Oscar the Grouch and the Olympic Diving Pools in Rio de Janeiro similar?

They're both green, smell like farts, and will stay that way for 47 years.

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What's the difference between Oscar the grouch and a grouch at the Oscars?

Ones green and the other is black

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between an Engineering student and an Arts student when tying their shoes?

The arts student gets a mark for it.

What's the difference between squash and zucchini?

You can't zucchini bugs! A family-friendly take on the age old "jam VS jelly" joke.

Fart Jokes More Fart Jokes

What time is it in Ireland when someone farts too much?

Two-forty (use an Irish accent)... It's two-farty

Why fart and waste it?

When you can burp and taste it.

One Jokes More One Jokes

Why do all Asian kids get straight A's?

Because the ones that don't are never heard from again. I'll be here all day folks.

Whats the difference between a smart midget and a venereal disease?

Ones a cunning runt...

Oscar Jokes More Oscar Jokes

Why did Leonardo DiCaprio visit Sesame Street?

It was his only chance to see an Oscar

What's pretty and expensive but has no use?

Leonardo DiCaprio's Oscar shelf.

Rio De Janeiro Jokes More Rio De Janeiro Jokes

What did the Russian athlete say when he was stung by a mosquito during the Summer Olympics in Rio de Janeiro?

zika blyat

How are Oscar the Grouch and the Olympic Diving Pools in Rio de Janeiro similar?

They're both green, smell like farts, and will stay that way for 47 years.

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

What's the difference between the England football team and a teabag?

The teabag stays longer in the cup.

What's Bruce Lee's favorite hotel to stay at?

The HYATT!!