How do fish make calls?

On a shellphone! My 7 year old self was very proud of coming up with this one....

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Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What works better than anti-depressants?

A 12 Gauge in the mouth This came to me whilst being all depressed.

What else did Lochte say after the truth came out?

This did not go swimmingly at all

Fish Jokes More Fish Jokes

What did a disappointed Arnold Schwarzenegger say when he fished up a Salmon?

IT'S NOT A TUNA!!!"

Why did Bill Gates &amp?

Warren Buffett once have me quickly kicked out of a game of bridge? When it was my turn to bid I kept saying, "Go fish".

7 Year Old Jokes More 7 Year Old Jokes

What's the definition of a redneck virgin?

A 7 year-old girl who can run faster than her brothers.

Why do bees sting?

They can't bite because all that honey rotted their teeth. (From my 7 year old niece)

Shellphone Jokes More Shellphone Jokes

What is the latest fad among teenage mermaids in the city of Atlantis?

Taking shellfies with their shellphones.

How did the turtle call his friends?

on his shellphone

Call Jokes More Call Jokes

How many calls do I get?

cop: one me: What do you think is more likely a lawyer delivering pizza or a dominos providing legal counsel

What do you call a 2 legged dog who always ignore your calls?

Your ex!