How do you stop a thundering herd of Apes?

Hold up your arm and say "Go back you didn't say 'May I'"

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Arm Jokes More Arm Jokes

What do you call a man in the ocean with no arms or legs?

Bob.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs playing in a pile of leaves?

Rustle

Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

How many white people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them. One to hold the bulb and the rest to screw the world.

How 'bout this one?

Salesman: Sir, we've been over this, I don't know how many McNuggets it will hold.

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

How do you stop squirrels playing football in the garden?

Hide the ball it drives them nuts!

How do you stop joint pain?

Turn it around.

Ape Jokes More Ape Jokes

Why do Apes love to go to school in bad neighbourhoods?

They like any jungle - even a blackboard jungle!

Why did both Germany and the U.S want to hire Apes during World War Two?

Because they are excellent at waging Gorilla warfare!

Thunder Jokes More Thunder Jokes

Why did Thor file a police report?

Because someone stole his thunder

What did the thunder say when it understood the joke?

I feel so enlightninged!