How do you tell the difference between a Fabric Designer and a Science Professor?

Ask them to pronounce "LATEX"

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between Emo teenagers and your lawn?

Your lawn won't cut itself.

What's the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods?

Santa stops after 3 Ho's

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How can you tell that the hippie kid got laid?

Two clean fingers.

How can you tell if a woman's picture is photoshopped?

She isn't standing in the kitchen

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What about the kids?

he asked. I said, "they're still together."

What did the blind man say when he was asked what he thought about the renovation plan of his house?

I don't know.. I just don't see it.

Pronounce Jokes More Pronounce Jokes

Why isn't the holiday on December 25th pronounced "Chlistmas"?

Because there's no L.

Why are there exactly two hundred and thirty nine beans in an Irish Bean Soup?

Because if there were one more, it'd be two forty. (Too farty) This works much better when spoken out loud. The joke how Irish people pronounce "forty."