What are your best 'no arm, no legs' jokes?

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on his porch Matt.

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Matt Jokes More Matt Jokes

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs at your front door?

Matt

What do you call a quadruple amputee trying to swim?

Bob. Same guy laying on the floor Matt. Same guy hanging on the wall Art. Same guy in a mailbox Bill.

Arm Jokes More Arm Jokes

Why'd Sally fall off the swings?

Cause she's got no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs playing in the leaves?

Russell.

Leg Jokes More Leg Jokes

What's got four legs and no ears?

A: Mike Tyson's dog.

What's the difference between an expensive purchase and a loud noise that scares a chicken?

One costs an arm and a leg. The other caused alarm and an egg.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What is your fee?

Lawyer says: "1000 US dollars for 3 questions." Man: "Wow - so much! Isn't it a bit expensive " Lawyer: "Yes, what is your third question "

What did the man who ate a clock say?

That was time consuming but I still want seconds.

Porch Jokes More Porch Jokes

How do you get an art major off your front porch?

Pay for the pizza!

How to get a liberal arts graduate off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza