What did the girl with no arms get for Christmas?

We don't know she hasn't opened her presents yet.

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Arm Jokes More Arm Jokes

What do you call a black with no arms?

Trustworthy.

Why was Aron Ralston arrested by the FBI?

For giving arms to Iraq.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why did the gynecologist giggle during the pap smear?

I don't know. It was an inside joke.

What's your stand on renewable energy?

I don't know about you, but I'm a Big Fan.

Present Jokes More Present Jokes

How did the townspeople react when the mayor presented them with a cost efficient, vegan protein source?

They chia'd.

What band does Santa listen to while delivering presents?

Slayer.

Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

What is Pat Sajak's favorite Christmas carol?

No L

What's the difference between modern pop and Christmas music?

One is 6 people singing 100 songs, the other is 100 people singing 6 songs.

Girl Jokes More Girl Jokes

Why do girls always walk around in odd numbered groups?

Because they can't even.

What do you call a girl that goes down right after you just met?

Ronda Rousey

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

How's your narcissism?

Much better I thin...*sees my ex walking by* opens window HOW ARE YOU STILL ALIVE I BROKE UP WITH YOU!"

How do you open a door underwater?

You swimming pull