Why do women have trouble peeing in the morning?

You ever tried to open a grilled cheese sandwich

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Try Jokes More Try Jokes

What happened to the Irishman who tried to blow up a school bus?

He burned his lips on the exhaust pipe.

Why did the French police arrested the Muslim teenager?

Because he was trying to detonate a Samsung Note 7.

Grill Jokes More Grill Jokes

Why don't women wear skirts in the winter?

Ever try and peel apart a cold grilled cheese sandwich

Why don't mexicans have barbeques?

the beans keep slipping through the grill.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What is long and hard that women don't have compulsorily?

The military service.

What do women and the square root of 2 have in common?

They're both irrational.

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

How to find out who loves you more - your dog or your wife?

Easy. Lock them both in a trunk and watch who will be happier to see you after you open it in 15 minutes.

How have you got that body?

I said, "I don't know officer, I just opened the boot and there she was."

Morning Jokes More Morning Jokes

What do you get when you have barbie dolls standing in a line?

A barbie queue (BBQ)! Also, I made a quick sketch on my iPad. I found the genesis to this joke as a text note in my Evernote this morning, after what seemed like a night of free flow beers. Feel free to downvote me to oblivion.

What's the difference between North Korea amd South Korea?

North Koreans have no Seoul. Thought of this very early in the morning waiting to board a plane.

Trouble Jokes More Trouble Jokes

What do you call an alligator trying to start trouble?

An instagator!

What did the man say when he couldn't get the gun to fire?

Looks like I'm gonna have to read the trouble shooting section of the manual."

Pee Jokes More Pee Jokes

What did the priest announce before he went for a bath?

Speak now or forever hold your pee!"

Why did the Teletubbies find it hard to pee?

They only have one Tinkie-Winkie

Grill Cheese Sandwich Jokes More Grill Cheese Sandwich Jokes

Why doesn't an old man ever go down on his old wife?

Ever opened a grilled-cheese sandwich?

Why don't old men like old women?

Ever tried to peel apart a grilled cheese sandwich