What do you call a Soviet ruler dancing on a cracker?

Putin on the Ritz. *ba-dum tsh*

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Putin Jokes More Putin Jokes

What do you think about the Russian military intervention in Krimea?

I think they're just Stalin. If they are, soviet, as long as they're Putin their weapons away.

What are you going to have for Thanksgiving dinner?

Putin: "Turkey"

Soviet Jokes More Soviet Jokes

What do you say when a corrupt Soviet takes a bathroom break right before war?

Now you're just Stallin.

Why did the Russians use peanuts for torture in the Cold War?

Because in Soviet Russia, Nut Cracks You!

Cracker Jokes More Cracker Jokes

Why did the black man have to sell his parrot?

because polly wanted a cracker

Why do carpets in white folk houses always need vacuuming?

Crackers always leave crumbs.

Dance Jokes More Dance Jokes

What do you wear to dance the salsa?

Hot pants.

What's a Brooklyn contractors favorite dance?

Dewalts

Ritz Jokes More Ritz Jokes

What do you get when you place a Russian leader on a cracker?

Putin on the Ritz.

What is the difference between a Ritz and a lesbian?

A Ritz is a snack cracker and a lesbian is a crack snacker