Why did the Russians use peanuts for torture in the Cold War?

Because in Soviet Russia, Nut Cracks You!

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Russian Jokes More Russian Jokes

Why was WWI so short?

Because they were Russian... Why was WWII so long? They were Stalin...

What does a Russian use to wipe their mouth?

a soviet

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What do you do if your wife starts smoking?

Slow down and use lubricant.

What do you call a weapon used by a Canadian ninja?

A: Canuck-chucks.

Russia Jokes More Russia Jokes

What would happen if Russia ran out of vodka?

Well, my dear reddit, in nature there is law of conservation of matter. Therefore, if the vodka disappeared somewhere, it would appear somewhere else. And then there would be Russia.

What did the NSA say to Russia after the blizzard?

We're Snowden!

Soviet Jokes More Soviet Jokes

What do communists put in their soup?

Soviet Onions.

What does a Russian use to wipe their mouth?

a soviet

Torture Jokes More Torture Jokes

How do you torture Hellen Keller?

Give her a basketball and tell her to read it.

What do you call the feeling of being a tortured insect?

Antagony

Peanut Jokes More Peanut Jokes

What do you call a peanut with a cold?

Cashew! she was so proud of herself for making me laugh with this one.

What did people call the Nutty Professor before he became a professor?

Mr. Peanut

Cold War Jokes More Cold War Jokes

Why didn't The Cold War happen?

Russia kept Stalin it

Why was it so easy to find the buried communist treasure after the Cold War?

Because X Marx the spot.

Soviet Russia Jokes More Soviet Russia Jokes

Why did the Russians use peanuts for torture in the Cold War?

Because in Soviet Russia, Nut Cracks You!

What fabric is worn in Soviet Russia?

Linen