What do you do with an infected chemist?

You try to Curium. If that doesn't work and he dies, then Barium

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Try Jokes More Try Jokes

How did Helen Keller break her arm?

She broke it trying to read the road signs.

Why can't American engineers design linear actuators?

Because they always try to maximize the degrees of freedom.

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

What does a math teacher do when he has hemorrhoids?

He works them out with a pencil.

What did I say when my Neutrogena products worked?

well I'm glad I've gotten that cleared up

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What did the blonde medical student die from?

An aneurysm.

Why did the elephant paint his balls green?

Answer: to hide in avocado trees.. How did Tarzan die? Answer: Picking avocados

Barium Jokes More Barium Jokes

What did the Chemist have with his Eggs?

Barium, Cobalt and Nitrogen.

Why do scientists call Helium , Barium and Curium the medical elements?

Because if you can't Helium or Curium , You'd Barium!

Curium Jokes More Curium Jokes

Why do chemists call helium, curium, and barium 'the medical elements'?

Because, if you can't 'helium' or 'curium', you 'BARIUM'!

What do you do with a sick chemist?

If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium.