What do you do with an infected chemist?

You try to Curium. If that doesn't work and he dies, then Barium

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Why did Mary get a restraining order against Black Beard the Pirate?

He kept trying to plunder her booty.

Whats the first thing you do when you spill something on your keyboard?

Try to disable sticky keys.

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What's a similarity between obese people, and my relationships with women?

They don't work out.

What do a communist and communism itself have in common?

Neither one works.

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

How did Mace Windu from Star Wars die?

Through the windu!

Why are ghosts always just moaning?

Did your manners die too Use your words!

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What do you do to a chemist after they die?

You Barium

What is an Undertaker's favorite element?

Barium.

Curium Jokes More Curium Jokes

Why do scientists call Helium , Barium and Curium the medical elements?

Because if you can't Helium or Curium , You'd Barium!

What do you do with an infected chemist?

You try to Curium. If that doesn't work and he dies, then Barium