What's the difference between a fruit and a vegetable?

A fruit doesn't need a wheelchair

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between a dead baby and a water melon?

One's fun to hit with a sledge hammer, the other one's a water melon.

What's the difference between an erection and a Camaro?

I don't have a Camaro....

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

Why do receipts need to be 75 feet long?

I reach into my pocket thinking I have a wad of cash, turns out I just bought a soda earlier.

What does Deadpool need?

Someone to merc him shut up.

Wheelchair Jokes More Wheelchair Jokes

Why can't people in wheelchairs be looked at for too long?

The can't handle stares.

What do you call Charlie Sheen in a wheelchair?

ROLAIDS

Vegetable Jokes More Vegetable Jokes

What type of vegetable is only kinda awesome?

A radish

What did Dahmer do when he finished his vegetables?

A: He threw away their wheelchairs!

Fruit Jokes More Fruit Jokes

Why do people buy fruit already cut up?

There's only like 7 things in life easier than cutting up fruit and one of them is farting.

What type of fruit is impossible to marry?

Cantaloupe