What's the difference between this morning and your wife?

I'm not coming in *this morning*"

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between a dancer and a duck?

One goes quick on her beautiful legs the other goes quack on her beautiful legs.

What's the difference between your mom and an alpaca?

One's a hairy beast that spits and the other's native to South America.

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What do you get when you put the batteries in the Energizer Bunny backwards?

It keeps coming and coming and coming...

What did the insect say when he saw a gnat get hit?

He did gnat see that coming"

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What type of wife always knows where her husband is?

A widow

What did you get me for Mother's Day?

3-year-old: A cake. Wife: Where is it 3: You haven't made it yet.

Morning Jokes More Morning Jokes

Why does a farmer look out of his window in the morning?

A: Because he can't see through the wall.

What time do you get up in the morning ?

About an hour and a half after I arrived at school