Whats the difference between an Irish Party and an Irish Funeral?

One less drunken Irishman

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between ooh and aah?

Just three inches.

What's the difference between wife and a blue whale?

About 10 pounds.

S Jokes More S Jokes

Whats the difference between a lentil and a chickpea?

I wouldn't pay 200 to have a lentil on in my mouth

Whats the difference between a rectal and an oral thermometer?

The taste.

Irishman Jokes More Irishman Jokes

What did the Irishman text his Wife?

Honey I'm down at the pub having a pint with the lads. Be home in about 30 min. If I'm not back by then please read this message again."

What do you call an Irishman who can't hold his liquor?

OC A quadriplegic.

Irish Jokes More Irish Jokes

How many beans do you put in Irish chili?

Two hundred and thirty-nine. Why Because one more would be two-farty.

Why does d' perfect Irish stew require exactly two hundred n' terty nine beans?

Because if you added one more it'd be two farty.

Irish Funeral Jokes More Irish Funeral Jokes

Whats the difference between an Irish wedding, and an Irish funeral?

There's one less drunk.

Which has less drunks: an Irish wedding or an Irish funeral?

An Irish funeral has one less drunk.

Drunken Irishman Jokes More Drunken Irishman Jokes

What did the drunken Irishman say to the Chinese diplomat?

http://www.reddit.com/r/Youwritethepunchline/comments/2zg1zy/whatdidthedrunkenirishmansaytothechinese/

Whats the difference between an Irish Party and an Irish Funeral?

One less drunken Irishman