When O. J. Simpson's kids wanted to go out and play, what did he tell them?

Go axe your mother."

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What do all Amish girls want?

Two Mennonite

What is a paranoid man's favorite food?

Who wants to know?

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How can you tell the difference between a crocodile and an alligator?

One you'll see in a while, the other you'll see later. Credit to Mitch hedburg

Why didn't Ronda go to Prom?

she got Holm schooled told me to go here .

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Why did Jesus quit playing ice hockey?

He kept getting nailed to the boards.

What do you call a computer that only plays sad songs?

Adele

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What do you do when your mother-in-law is swaying towards you?

You pull the trigger again.

What do you see as your biggest weakness?

ME: INTERVIEWER: ME: MY MOTHER: He's not good at speaking up for himself

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How to tell if you're wearing too much Axe: 1. Are you wearing Axe?

No- Good. Yes- That's too much.

What happens if an axe falls on your car?

You have an ax-i-dent (accident).

O. J. Simpson Jokes More O. J. Simpson Jokes

When O. J. Simpson's kids wanted to go out and play, what did he tell them?

Go axe your mother."

What's O. J. Simpson's Internet address?

Slash slash backslash slash slash escape.