Where's the dog?

flashback to me giving him the keys to the car to get more beer* ME: I let him outside.

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Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

What's updog?

Mom: Just waking you up for school, dog, what's up wit u Dad (from hallway): OWNED

What do dogs have that no other animal has ?

Puppy dogs !

Let Jokes More Let Jokes

What's the difference between a four year old and a bag of cocaine?

Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out a window.

What do you tell a man with two black eyes?

Nothing, he's been told twice already. (And be cool, if you get the reference keep quiet and let em wonder.)

Car Jokes More Car Jokes

What do you call clothes for a car?

A tire.

What kind of snake is it good to have on a car?

Windshield vipers.

Beer Jokes More Beer Jokes

What's a man's idea of a balanced diet?

Beer in each hand!

How do you change root beer in to a beer?

Put it in a square cup

Key Jokes More Key Jokes

Why do baby clothes have pockets?

I've never heard a baby say: "cigarettes,phone and keys alright let's go"

What hangs at a man's thigh and wants to poke the hole that it's often poked before?

A key.

Flashback Jokes More Flashback Jokes

Why was that guy yelling at you?

flashback to me ignoring the "one per customer" sign me with a mouthful of cheese samples No idea

How was work?

flashback to me being asked to leave the meeting because I couldn't stop giggling after someone said "abreast" me:Good