There's already a clock on the stove
Your wife.
Tequila
Easy. Lock them both in a trunk and watch who will be happier to see you after you open it in 15 minutes.
Because it Lubri-Can't Even!
Everyone who bought his tickets wanted their nickelback
SHE WAS MENTALLY ILL!!!!!!
A: A lunartick.
So women know where to stand in the kitchen.
The stove.