Why has no one invented a device where I can move myself around from place to place while lying in a hammock?

I remember when we used to make stuff in this lazy country!

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What kind of money does Mario use?

8-bitcoins

What kind of CB Radio do seagulls use?

Squawky-talkies!

Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

What lies on the bottom of the ocean and shakes?

A nervous wreck.

What came first?

A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is leaning against the headboard smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face. The egg, looking a bit ticked off, grabs the sheet, rolls over and says ... "Well, I guess we finally answered THAT question!"

Stuff Jokes More Stuff Jokes

Why won't the machines just take over already?

I'm tired of doing stuff.

Where does Wonder Woman buy all her stuff?

Amazon.

Remember Jokes More Remember Jokes

What did you learn in kindergarten today?

5-year-old: A doughnut would help me remember. Apparently she learned bribery.

Why can't you be the king I know?

The king you have inside you SIMBA: That doesn't make sense. I think I'd remember if I ate a king.

Place Jokes More Place Jokes

How is lightning like a violist's fingers?

A: Neither one strikes in the same place twice.

What do you get when you watch Cinderella backwards?

You see a woman learn her place.

Invent Jokes More Invent Jokes

Who invented the equation?

A X-pert

How did cows feel when the branding iron was invented?

They were very impressed!

Device Jokes More Device Jokes

What do you call the device that keeps an Armenian man safe?

A Serj Protector.

What did one device say to the other?

A: Are you syncing what I"m syncing