Why can't you be the king I know?

The king you have inside you SIMBA: That doesn't make sense. I think I'd remember if I ate a king.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What is the difference between 1 Gb and 2 Gb?

Student - Well, I don't know. I guess one is a bit too high?

What happens when you see two twin sister witches?

You don't know which witch is which!

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

Why don't all Libertarian candidates have dwarfism?

I thought Libertarians believed in small government.

What do I think about my toes?

They couldn't be further from my mind.

Eat Jokes More Eat Jokes

Why is the number eight afraid of the number seven?

Because seven ate nine.

Why did the vegan zombie visit the coma ward?

Because it only ate vegetables.

Remember Jokes More Remember Jokes

What's joke #1?

THIS IS NOT A JOKE I'm sure you all have heard the joke where has a number for each joke and that everyone just remembers the numbers instead for typing out the jokes. This always made me think "What would joke #1 be?" What do you think it'd be?

What do you call a Mustard that keeps remembering things that haven't happened yet?

dijon-vu mustard... (Sorry)

King Jokes More King Jokes

What's one profession that doctors, lawyers, even the king of Saudi Arabia and the presidents of the USSR and US bow their heads to?

Barbers.

What do you call a king with a weed addiction?

Your royal highness.

Simba Jokes More Simba Jokes

Why is Simba slower that his dad?

Because his papa mufasa.

Why did Simba's dad die?

He couldn't Mufasa

Sense Jokes More Sense Jokes

What do these 2 have in common What does your mum and a politician have in common?

When they scream they make no sense

Why don't kleptomaniacs have a sense of humor?

Because they take everything, literally....