Why is a bad government like a bikini?

Because people marvel at what's holding it up. And they wish it would fall.

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Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

What's the difference between Jesus and an oil painting?

You only need one nail to hold up a picture.

What has 200 teeth and holds back Godzilla?

My zipper

People Jokes More People Jokes

What is the real reason leaves fall to the ground?

They know people will blow them.

Why do people love their smartphones so much?

Because opposites attract. (Told to me by 2 students today, loved it!)

Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

Why did the blind women fall into a well?

Someone pushed her

Why did the guy fall off his bicycle?

Because I threw a microwave at him

Marvel Jokes More Marvel Jokes

Why was Nikola Tesla a fan of Marvel?

Because he didn't like DC...

What did the Marvel character say when he attained full control of his Android's CPU and Kernel?

I am Root.

Wish Jokes More Wish Jokes

Whats the difference between a hippie on fire and a lifetime supply of patchouli?

I don't wish for a lifetime supply every time I smell patchouli.

What do werewolves put at the bottom of their e-mails?

Beast wishes.

Bikini Jokes More Bikini Jokes

What do you call a sheman wearing a bikini?

Flaccid

How do you make the king leer?

Put the queen in a bikini! (From krusty the klown)