Marvel Jokes

Why did Aquaman join the DC universe instead of Marvel?

Because he was hydra-phobic.

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Who makes the music for the Marvel movies?

The Avengers Ensemble.

Why is a bad government like a bikini?

Because people marvel at what's holding it up. And they wish it would fall.

Why was Nikola Tesla a fan of Marvel?

Because he didn't like DC...

What did the Marvel character say when he attained full control of his Android's CPU and Kernel?

I am Root.

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Like Jokes More Like Jokes

When I was your age I ate every one. Mary: Do you still like crusts Grandma?

Grandma: Yes I do. Mary: Well you can have mine.

Who doesn't like to sit in front of the fire?

A Snowman.

Kernel Jokes More Kernel Jokes

What do you call corn that joins the army?

Kernel.

Why did the chicken jump into the bag of popcorn?

The kernel was looking for him.

Wish Jokes More Wish Jokes

What is your first wish?

Joe: I want to be rich. Genie: Granted. What is your second wish Rich: I want lots of money.

What's the cruelest curse to wish upon a single guy?

I wish his hands were made of stone."

Cpu Jokes More Cpu Jokes

What did the CPU say to the RAM?

Sorry to cache you out but I want the data closer. The RAM replied: you're right, "life" is too short.

What did the Marvel character say when he attained full control of his Android's CPU and Kernel?

I am Root.

Bikini Jokes More Bikini Jokes

What do you call a sheman wearing a bikini?

Flaccid

Why did the blond lay out on the lawn chair in her bikini at midnight?

She wanted to get a dark tan.

Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

How many people from Quebec does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One: He holds the bulb and the rest of Canada revolves around him.

Where's the baby?

while holding the baby. I can't believe it was legal for me to reproduce.

People Jokes More People Jokes

What do you call people who don't repost jokes?

liars

Why are people in silicon valley better coders than others?

Because of their proximity to the I'll let myself out..

Dc Jokes More Dc Jokes

What do the Washington Metro system and the Little Mermaid have in common?

They're both under DC.

Why was Nikola Tesla a fan of Marvel?

Because he didn't like DC...