Why should we elect Gabe Newell as President of the United States?

So there won't be a World War III.

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President Jokes More President Jokes

What one noun, verb, and US President sums up a scientist's hopes and fears?

Grant.

Who is a Minion's favorite politician?

First ever president of Zimbabwe, President Banana

Elect Jokes More Elect Jokes

How do you know Bernie Sanders got elected?

All your stuff has been donated to charity

Why should we elect Gabe Newell as President of the United States?

So there won't be a World War III.

United States Jokes More United States Jokes

What's a black person of the United States called?

A frickin' American. What'd you expect, something racist

What do Ohio and Mackerels have in common?

Nothing! Ohio is the only state in the United States that's name shares no letters with the word mackerel.

Gabe Newell Jokes More Gabe Newell Jokes

Why doesn't Gabe Newell have kids?

He can't get to 3rd base

What's Gabe Newell's favourite game?

Angry Nerds

World War Iii Jokes More World War Iii Jokes

Why should we elect Gabe Newell as President of the United States?

So there won't be a World War III.

What's the difference between Russian football fans and an old drunkard in a bar at closing time?

Kicking the old drunkard out won't start world war III.