Why won't the Alzheimer's patient pay attention to you?

Because he doesn't know the time of day.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know ancient Egyptians loved books so much?

Because they built their stuff with reads!

When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him?

I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people......

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

How do you stop ISIS?

Leave some milk in the sun for a few days.

Why the population in India is exploding these days?

Because everyone over there is doing IT!

Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

What's best about hiring an immigrant midget?

You pay them under the table )

When should you charge a battery?

A: When you can't pay cash.

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What would you get if Geddy Lee, Neil Peart and Alex Lifeson all died in a plane crash?

Take your time, there's no Rush...

Why do grandparents have so many clocks?

So they won't run out of time

Attention Jokes More Attention Jokes

Why did the feminist sign up for football?

She wanted to be the center of attention.

What did carbon yell at gold while trying to get his attention?

A! U!!! If it doesn't make sense tell it so someone out loud. Pretty sure this is my first original joke :)

Alzheimer Patient Jokes More Alzheimer Patient Jokes

How does an Alzheimer's patient celebrate New Years?

Kissing strangers.

What does an Alzheimer's patient say whenever they browse /r/funny?

Hey, this looks new!"