How did you get those horrible burns?

flashback to me enjoying some hot soup on a rollercoaster* I saved a litter of puppies from a fire.

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Save Jokes More Save Jokes

How do dating sites in Alabama save money?

They link to Ancestry.com

What's the best way to save on toilet paper?

Slow your roll.

Puppy Jokes More Puppy Jokes

What is the difference between a liberal and a puppy?

A: A puppy stops whining after it grows up.

What if I see a puppy?

What if my house burns down

Fire Jokes More Fire Jokes

Why would you stay friends with an ex-girlfriend?

When you get fired from a job, you don't stay around and watch other people do your job.

What is a KKK member's favorite board game?

CROSS fire

Enjoy Jokes More Enjoy Jokes

What's Lisbeth's twin sister's name who enjoys spending time on the internet?

Elizabeth.

Why do farts smell?

So deaf people can enjoy them too.

Litter Jokes More Litter Jokes

Why did the mother cat put stamps on her kittens?

A: Because she wanted to mail a litter.

What do you call a litter of puppies who've been out in the snow?

Slush Puppies

Flashback Jokes More Flashback Jokes

How'd the date go?

Not good. Too many red flags. *Flashback to her house being covered with USSR flags* I think she might be a communist.

Where's the dog?

flashback to me giving him the keys to the car to get more beer* ME: I let him outside.

Rollercoaster Jokes More Rollercoaster Jokes

What did Napoleon say on the rollercoaster?

Ouiiiiiiii!

How did you get those horrible burns?

flashback to me enjoying some hot soup on a rollercoaster* I saved a litter of puppies from a fire.