How do you react when looking in the mirror?

You cry because you shoved a cactus up your peckar.

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Cry Jokes More Cry Jokes

Why does the sky cry sometimes?

Because it's blue :(

Why was the cookie crying?

Because it's mom was a wafer so long.

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why should we hire you?

Me: Well, if you hire me, I will make all of your other employees look FANTASTIC by comparison.

Whats the word im looking for?

You're part of a three-man space crew orbiting Earth. You can ONLY relay one, one word message in 2 seconds. Whats the word

Mirror Jokes More Mirror Jokes

How can you double your money?

Look at it in a mirror.

How does Dracula get his hair so perfect without a mirror?

Oh questions about the job No I'm good."

Cactus Jokes More Cactus Jokes

How does a cactus do his math homework?

He uses a cacti-lator!

What's the difference between a BMW and a cactus?

on a cactus, the pricks are on the outside

Shove Jokes More Shove Jokes

What did Jay Z say to Beyonce after having an ice cream shoved up his arse?

I'm feeling a bit sorbet.

How's the baby?

Me: He keeps trying to shove socks thru the mail slot. Wife: Aw. His socks or yours Me: Socks is the neighbor's cat..

React Jokes More React Jokes

How do you react to the fragrance of a bottle of wine from the year 2000?

Smells like teen spirit.

Why didn't anyone react when the king farted?

Because it was a noble gas