How do you read the Gospel According to Shrek?

Open your bible to Psalm BODY ONCE TOLD ME

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Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How can you tell if a Mobile software developer isn't enjoying his job?

He isn't very App-y

What would you say about someone who li kes to tell cancer jokes?

That he has a sense of tumor (Courtesy of twitter.com/sorryforthelolz)

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

How do you cause a riot at a cat show?

Open a can

What time does Sean Connery go to the US Open?

Tennish

Bible Jokes More Bible Jokes

Which part of the Bible won't you find a black man?

The Book of Job.

Where is tennis mentioned in the Bible?

A: Where Joseph served in Pharaoh's court.

Shrek Jokes More Shrek Jokes

What does Shrek say when he wins a game of chess?

Shrekmate.

What is Shrek's favorite book?

Don-key xote

Gospel Jokes More Gospel Jokes

Which gospel contains Jesus' parable about the shades of numbers?

Math hue.

What is the difference between a black person and a tire?

The tire doesn't sing gospels when you put it in chains.

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

Why accountants don't read novels?

Because the only numbers in them are page numbers.

What limitations does braille have? Can it represent everything that we read using the alphabet?

Very limited fonts.

Accord Jokes More Accord Jokes

How many reindeers does Santa Claus have?

Santa Claus has 10 reindeers according to the song.

How do librarians file melted marshmallows?

A: According to the Gooey Decimal System.