How many times should you try starting your snowblower before you realize it's not going to start?

According to my neighbor it's 458 times.

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Start Jokes More Start Jokes

What four letter word starts with F ends in K and if you can't get it you have to use your hands or fingers...?

A fork

What is the difference between a tire and a black man?

The tire doesn't start singing when you chain it.

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

Why is that, doc?

He replied, "I'm trying to examine you."

What do call it when actor Charles Dance tries to flirt?

Dance moves.

Accord Jokes More Accord Jokes

How do librarians file melted marshmallows?

A: According to the Gooey Decimal System.

What do you get when you wreck a Honda Accord into a Saturn Ion?

An Accordion. ...I'll, uh, see myself out.

Realize Jokes More Realize Jokes

How is a push-up bra like a bag of chips?

As soon as you open it, you realize it's half empty.

What do you call a black guy at college?

A miracle. Edit: I've hidden this post as I realized it was stupid and too offensive. I'm sorry, it was overly racist.

Neighbor Jokes More Neighbor Jokes

How did Mister Baggins know when his neighbor had died?

He read it in the Hobbituary.

How do you see countries neighboring Russia?

Ukraine your neck.

Snowblower Jokes More Snowblower Jokes

Whats red, white, and hangs from a telephone pole?

A dead baby shot out of a snowblower.

Why did the snowman pull down his pants?

Because he saw the snowblower coming