What did the Challenger Austronaut day to his wife before he left?

You feed the kids, I'll feed the fishes."

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What did the husband say to his wife when he tried pushing it in as much as he could, but it still wouldn't fit?

He said "I'm going to try on a different shoe size."

Whats the difference between a burglar and an ex-wife?

At least the burglar has the decency to leave you the house.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What did the executioner say to his wife when he left?

I'll beheading out now.

What do you call a Hungarian insect who won't leave siddhartha alone?

A Buddha-pest.

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

Which kid is mine?

I like to reply "I haven't decided yet."

Why doesn't Barbie have any kids?

Because Ken came in another box.

Fish Jokes More Fish Jokes

What kind of fish has two knees?

A tunee fish.

Where does an 800 pound gorilla sleep?

With the fishes.

Feed Jokes More Feed Jokes

What did the farmer say after he fed his cows pot?

the Steaks are high."

What's the difference between an Arts student and a large pizza?

A large pizza can feed a family of 4