Whats the difference between a burglar and an ex-wife?

At least the burglar has the decency to leave you the house.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between most people and planes?

Most people miss the twin towers.

What's the difference between a hunter and a fisherman?

A hunter lies in wait. A fisherman waits and lies.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

How did the sad clown smile and laugh again?

They told him his wife died recently.

Why is a good husband like bread dough?

Because his wife needs him.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Why did the orange stop rolling down the hill?

It ran out of juice. I shall take my leave now.

What is the worst thing anyone can do to a blind man?

Leave a plunger in the toilet!

S Jokes More S Jokes

Whats the only free food you will get from a Nigerian scammer?

Spam.

Whats the best part about living in Switzerland?

Not sure, but the flag is a big plus.

House Jokes More House Jokes

What did the cholo say when two houses fell on top of him?

Get off me homes!

Why do they name all hurricanes after women?

Because when they arrive they are wet and wild, and when they leave they take your house and car

Ex Jokes More Ex Jokes

How to stop an unwanted DM. Hi, how are you?

Me: Well, my ex has me on a wanted list because I'm a psychotic cow, how are you

How many of my ex-girlfriends does it take to change a lightbulb?

One. Apparently she will screw anything.

Burglar Jokes More Burglar Jokes

How did the burglar get into the house?

Intruder window

What did the burglar say to the lady who caught him stealing her silver?

I'm at your service ma'am.