What is your emergency?

Me: I love you. 911: Hang up. Me: No you hang up. 911: Stop. Me: This is so us.

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Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

How do you stop your laptop batteries from running out?

Hide their trainers.

What's the difference between a Tiger Woods and Santa Claus?

Santa stops at 3 ho's

Hang Jokes More Hang Jokes

Why should you not let your kids go to Korean Discos?

Because you don't want them hanging around Parks at night.

Where would you find the emo kid at his birthday party?

Just *hanging* out by himself in the bedroom

911 Jokes More 911 Jokes

Why are Republicans always so strung up about 9/11?

A: Elephants never forget.

Why was 10 afraid?

Because it was in the middle of 9/11

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

Why were the welder and stoner such good friends?

They both love to spark up joints.

What did Casper say to his girlfriend?

I love you, boo!!

Emergency Jokes More Emergency Jokes

Why is mustard good to have in case of an emergency?

It's always prepared.

What's the emergency?

How long before the rice is ready "