Who won the race between two balls of string?

They we're tied!

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Win Jokes More Win Jokes

Why did Eli Manning didn't react to the Broncos winning the Superbowl?

Because the fine bros would sue.

Which art piece won the Texas Muhammad cartoon contest?

Two chalk outlines.

Ball Jokes More Ball Jokes

What goes "ha ha, thump thump?

A guy laughing his balls off.

Why was Cinderella kicked off the basketball team?

She kept running away from the ball

Race Jokes More Race Jokes

Why don't Germans compete in marathons?

They have a sad history of not finishing off races.

What do you call a cat who takes a shortcut in a race?

A Cheetah.

Tie Jokes More Tie Jokes

Why can't Chinese people tie their shoes?

I would love to tell you, but I am afraid the answer is a little bit lacist.

What did the shoelace say when I tried to tie it?

Uh, like, can you knot?

String Jokes More String Jokes

What's more fun than swinging a dead baby by a string?

Stopping it with a shovel!

How did the puppeteer meet the President?

He pulled some strings.