Why did the vampire sit on a pumpkin?

It wanted to play squash.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Which do you want to hear first?

Paul: I have good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first? Michael: The good news. Paul: The good news is that I have no bad news.

Why do Polish people keep empty bottles in their refrigerator?

For people that don't want anything to drink

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

What game do enemy naval officers play in the sauna?

Battleshvitz

Why did a pair of tomatoes play footsie?

To-mate-toes!

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

What Happened when the girl sat on Lance Armstrong's lap?

She had a ball

How did Humpty Dumpty get ripped?

Wall-sits.

Pumpkin Jokes More Pumpkin Jokes

Why was Cinderella bad at basketball?

Because her coach was always a pumpkin.

What do stupid kids do at Halloween?

They carve a face on an apple and go bobbing for pumpkins.

Vampire Jokes More Vampire Jokes

What do vampires have at eleven o'clock every day?

A coffin break.

What's the best time of this month for vampires?

It depends on the girl

Squash Jokes More Squash Jokes

What is Godzilla's favorite fruit?

Squash.

What game do monsters play with humans?

Squash.