Background Jokes

How can you tell if it is a Salvador Dali painting?

One of the clouds in the background is blowing another one.

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Couple's Daily Question Mug
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Who slept with my wife?

and in the background someone replied "You ain't got enough bullets."

Who was that coughing in the background?

Me : Oh, that was Denise. Dad: Oh, da' niece I thought it was da' nephew. Buh dum tsssssssss

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Salvador Dali Jokes More Salvador Dali Jokes

What does Salvador Dali have for breakfast?

Surreal.

How can you tell if it is a Salvador Dali painting?

One of the clouds in the background is blowing another one.

Cough Jokes More Cough Jokes

What did the Shetland Pony say when asked if his cough had cleared up?

Yes, thanks, but I'm still a little horse."

What's the worst part about getting a lung transplant?

The first couple of times you cough, the loogeys aren't yours!

Nephew Jokes More Nephew Jokes

Which woman has Jesus as a nephew?

The Auntie Christ.

Who was that coughing in the background?

Me : Oh, that was Denise. Dad: Oh, da' niece I thought it was da' nephew. Buh dum tsssssssss

Skin Colour Jokes More Skin Colour Jokes

What did one Muslim say to another in a supermarket?

Nothing very interesting, they are both completely ordinary members of society who should not be judged based on their ethnic background and skin colour... ...And then the building exploded.

What did the surgeon tell Michael Jackson before he changed his skin colour?

Everything's gonna be all white.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What do you tell a woman that has 37 stab wounds?

Nothing, you already told her 37 times.

How many true friends do you believe you have?

Me: Define "true friend." Shrink: Someone you feel you can tell anything. Me: 11,419.

Society Jokes More Society Jokes

What's balck on the bottom and white on the top?

Society

How do introverts feel within society?

removed

Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

Why do Vampires make poor project managers?

Because the refuse you to meet with stake holders. (why yes, I am a dad why do you ask )

Why did the dad make the joke?

For the pun of it.

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

Why did nobody in the Orlando nightclub fight back?

They weren't thinking straight.

What gets wetter the more you dry?

A woman on a tumble dryer! (Bet you thought I was gonna say 'a towel', didn't you, silly redditors )