Exaggerate Jokes

What do men and Subway have in common?

They both exaggerate the length.

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What is literally the most important fact you'll ever learn, that will totally blow your mind?

That people exaggerate.

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Blow Jokes More Blow Jokes

What did the terrorist say to the police before he blew up the building?

C4 yourself!

What did Optimus Prime say to Arcee?

Have you ever blown a Transformer?

Learn Jokes More Learn Jokes

What is the first nursery rhyme blondes learn in primary school?

A. Hump me dump me!!

What is the first thing that vampires learn at school?

The alphabat.

Subway Jokes More Subway Jokes

What's Jared's favorite ingredient for his Subway sandwiches?

Extra virgin oil

How did Jared from Subway get food poisoning?

He ate a 5 year old weiner

Length Jokes More Length Jokes

What did the tailor say to his customer after shortening the length of his pants?

A-hem!

How do you calculate the length of rosemary?

Sprigonometry

People Jokes More People Jokes

How much ice does it take to preserve a dead body?

I ask on twitter because googling it gets people caught.

What country has the most people?

Brazil... They've got Brazillions

Mind Jokes More Mind Jokes

What's the one thing a hoarder has no trouble letting go of?

Their mind

What did the NFL Commissioner say when Adele turned down the Superbowl Halftime Show?

Never mind, I'll find someone like you

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What do you call a man on your porch?

Mat. I neglected to mention he has no arms or legs.

What does a man call a gorilla he loves?

Haram Bae