Motivational Speaker Jokes

What did the motivational speaker say to the duct?

You conduit!

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What's the difference between a motivational speaker and a baseball player?

The baseball player has all of its limbs.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between ooooooh and aaaaaaaah ?

About 3 inches

Whats the difference between Pink Floyd and Princess Diana?

Nothing, their last big hit was the wall.

Duct Jokes More Duct Jokes

What did the motivational speaker say to the duct?

You conduit!

What do you call Quicksilver when he's duct taping people's mouths?

A running gag.

James Bond Jokes More James Bond Jokes

Why does James Bond like Michael J Fox?

Because he always gets his martini shaken, not stirred.

How does James Bond type e-mails?

With his goldfinger.

Shake Jokes More Shake Jokes

What two things should people stop shaking because shaking hurts these things development?

Polaroid Integral Film and Babies

What lies on the bottom of the sea and shakes?

A nervous wreck! I first heard this at xmas 1952 (64 years ago) and it still makes me smile.

Audience Jokes More Audience Jokes

What's the difference between a Blues musician and a Jazz musician?

A blues musician plays 3 chords to audiences of thousands. A jazz musician plays thousands of chords to audiences of 3

Why is James Bond a terrible motivational speaker?

Because the audiences are shaken, not stirred.

Conduit Jokes More Conduit Jokes

What do you say to give an electrician encouragement?

You conduit!"

What did the motivational speaker say to the duct?

You conduit!

Stir Jokes More Stir Jokes

Why is James Bond a terrible motivational speaker?

Because the audiences are shaken, not stirred.

Why does James Bond like Michael J Fox?

Because he always gets his martini shaken, not stirred.

Limb Jokes More Limb Jokes

What did the starfish say when it realized that it lost it's ability to regenerate limbs?

I can't remember.

What do you call a gangster with no limbs?

A crip