Permission Jokes

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What do you call a snowman who cons people?

A snowfake I thought it was appropriate for this time of year. Merry Christmas reddit! You have my permission to tell this at any Xmas parties you attend

Star Wars: Dad Jokes: The Best Worst Jokes and Puns from a Galaxy Far, Far Away . . . .

Hardcover

How many trans women does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just one, but first they have to sit in the dark for a year and then get letters from two electricians giving them permission.

What do you call a sick bird of prey that enters the country without permission?

An ill-eagle

Why did the Islamic woman die when she fell into the ocean?

She thought to yell for help, but her husband was nowhere around to grant her permission to do so.

What do you call a drunk executioner?

A dun-GIN keeper. Edit: You have my permission to post this on r/dadjokes

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Xmas Jokes More Xmas Jokes

What do you call a snowman who cons people?

A snowfake I thought it was appropriate for this time of year. Merry Christmas reddit! You have my permission to tell this at any Xmas parties you attend

What has eight arms and tells the time?

A clocktopus Shoutout to the popper from my Xmas dinner

Turkish Jokes More Turkish Jokes

How many French words has the Turkish language recently adopted?

Beaucoup.

What's the Turkish version of court packing?

Turkey stuffing

Sick Bird Jokes More Sick Bird Jokes

What's the difference between illegal and unlawful?

One is against the law, the other is a sick bird.

What kind of sick bird is against the law?

an ill eagle

Merry Jokes More Merry Jokes

What is the linguistic description of sentences like 'ho ho ho' and 'merry Christmas'?

They are both santa clauses.

How to cats greet each other at Christmas ?

A furry merry Christmas & Happy mew year" !

Fly Jokes More Fly Jokes

What do you call a flying bus?

Bus Lightyear...

What did the shirt say to the pants zipper?

Your so fly man

Ill Eagle Jokes More Ill Eagle Jokes

What do you call a sick bird who has crossed a national border without consent?

An ILL-EAGLE! 2X COMBO

What kind of sick bird is against the law?

an ill eagle

Letter Jokes More Letter Jokes

What starts with the letter "M" and picks up metal?

Mexicans.

How do you know your boyfriend loves you?

SECOND PIGLET: He signs his letters with lots of hogs and kisses.

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

What did the puppy say when he sat on sand paper?

A: RUFF!

Why can't Sweden win a race?

Because, it always sits right behind the Finnish line