How does a snail win a race?

It runs against Hillary.

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Snail Jokes More Snail Jokes

What did the snail on the turtles back say?

WEEEEEEEEEE!

What did the slug say to the snail?

Would you like a copy of the big issue

Win Jokes More Win Jokes

What do you call a Snorlax that wants to win a race?

A cab.

Where did you get that?

The pig replies, "I won her in a raffle."

Hillary Jokes More Hillary Jokes

What is Hillary's newest election slogan?

Rigged, for her pleasure."

Why did vatican invite Bernie not Hillary?

They couldn't afford it.

Run Jokes More Run Jokes

What did the Tin Man say when he got run over by a steamroller?

Curses! Foil again!

Why not ask the guy who took that picture?

Just kidding, I ran over it.

Race Jokes More Race Jokes

What's the difference between the Holocaust and the Boston Marathon Bombing?

The Boston Marathon Bombing ended a race.

What's the same about Mexican and Black people?

Once you've seen Juan, you've seen Jamal. (Sorry if you're offended, I love all races.)