What did the teacher say after spending thousands in the expensive hotel?

I'm sorry to leave now that I've almost bought the place.

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Why didn't Drake head on down to South Park?

He would never leave his woes behind.

What does weed and your girlfriend have in common?

They both leave me sticky fingers. 7

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How do you buy hair?

You have toupee

Why do americans get manuals when buying a new car?

I thought they only drive automatic

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What birds spend all their time on their knees ?

Birds of prey !

How do you win a small fortune in Las Vegas?

By spending a large fortune.

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Where are you and Mom going tonight?

Me: To meet with your teacher. 7: Oh, you don't need to. I already saw her today.

What is a geometry teachers favorite movie?

Angles in the Outfield

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How many feminists do you need to replace a lightbulb?

Only 1, she'll hold the bulb in place and wait while the world revolves around her.

How many narcissists does it take to screw in a light-bulb?

One. He stands in place while the whole world revolves around him.

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What's the difference between rock and jazz?

Rock is playing three chords for a thousand people. Jazz is playing a thousand chords for three people.

What's the difference between a Blues musician and a Jazz musician?

A blues musician plays 3 chords to audiences of thousands. A jazz musician plays thousands of chords to audiences of 3