A liar.
A cat.
The Cat: because is a cat and a spider :) ... oh, wait.
A Mexican moose
A video game so realistic, when you screw up you have to play in a wheelchair.
Y NO LEGS!
Wife asks her husband: Honey, If a lion attacks my mother and I, Who would you save first? Husband: Well, the lion!
The sock under my bed. (I don't remember where I heard it. Can't claim ownership.)
They both picked up a Cougar and then thought better of it.
She uses a perfect son.
